Tay

My dad was a drunk; he beat me, he passed me around to his co-workers and let them rape me. My mom put herself in an Ambien induced coma to just wash it all away. So my whole life has just been me taking care of myself and my twin brother.⠀
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My brother developed a drug problem and ended up treating me just like my dad did. He'd just dismiss my feelings and I'd be left crying, wondering why I wasn't good enough. And I'm tired of not feeling good enough.⠀
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I turned into a typical goth girl; dyed my hair, got piercings and tattoos. I thought that covering up my scars with piercings and tattoos would make me feel better. But when you have all this pain and you know your parents are a huge cause of it, it's hard to break away from. I used to spend tons of time on my hair and makeup, making sure I was prim and proper. But after I OD'd, I decided I didn't want this image I had cultivated to define me⠀
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To be a healthier person, I had to face a lot of feelings I'd run away from for a long time. I had always tried so hard to be kind to other people, but I hadn't been kind to myself